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Message: <blockquote data-quote="MandyH" data-source="post: 8000" data-attributes="member: 424">For me it's people accusing me of 'helicopter parenting'. I have 31 and 32 year old offspring who still need a lot of support despite being what uninformed people would call 'high functioning' - pah! My youngest child lives and works away from home and needs rescue missions from time to time, either to sort her laundry or to help her declutter her living space. Very few people understand why she needs this.The eldest still lives at home and doesn't work. Currently having driving lessons. So far today (lesson day) two attempts to get her up and showered have failed because she is demand avoidant and cannot respond to being nagged. My husband knows this but continues to nag because he cannot let it go. This means she goes to her lesson stressed and cannot learn. He simply cannot cope with her leaving everything to the last minute and the instructor having to wait for her. He's undiagnosed...It was even harder when they were younger and I am glad those days are behind me but also feel I have failed massively as a parent because despite all the support and battling around their education, they aren't yet fully able to function independently in society and I am afraid for their future.  My youngest I think will be ok long term but I am terrified for my eldest.</blockquote>