Relationships with objects

[r.mcgowan-griffin]

Hi. This is a bit off-topic, but I noticed a couple of posts on this forum regarding objects as companions, and I wondered who else feels this way. For me, the bond is usually with machines, particularly cars.

I recently read a paper on objectum sexuality (OS) and autism, which was both interesting, and in some way comforting. The authors highlighted the need for further research and acceptance. However, I dislike the term 'objectum sexuality' as there is not necessarily a physical sexual component. I feel like the term could lead to it being misinterpreted as some kind of fetish rather than a deep emotional connection to objects. I hope that there can be greater recognition and understanding in the future.

I suspect that it is not as uncommon as is currently assumed and it is probably just understudied. 'OS' appears to be highly correlated with the autism spectrum, so it may help someone here to know that it is actually a thing. You are not alone. I can link the paper if anyone is interested.

 

[ProfessorWorm]

I would love to read the paper. I have a deep attachment to my stuffed animals and a few books. They’re for all intents and purposes friends, although I agree the term is a bit problematic as I’ve yet to think of them sexually or consider a romantic relationship with them.

 

[r.mcgowan-griffin]

Here is a link to the study; https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-019-56449-0

 

[seraphim]

Thanks for the link. I can easily relate to what has been said above. I often bring home abandoned toys and diverse paraphernalia, such as metal or wooden parts for example. I have always felt a deep connection with objects and often consider them on the same level as any other living species.

 

[Fluffymainecoons]

There was a UK documentary on this,I can’t remember the name of it-it might have been on Netflix but there was a girl obsessed with American objects, a girl obsessed with a very specific very old fairground ride-she bought it herself After years of it rusting away and I think there was someone obsessed with the tower in Paris, most of the people were on the spectrum,and there was nothing sexual about them in any case shown.

to me,it’s a passion for x,y or z object, not a sexual connection.
one of my old housemates who was diagnosed with profound autism, was regulary talked about by our staff in front of him as being sexually obsessed with the bonnets on parked cars and toilet bowls, if they bothered to understand him they woud know he learned the world through touch,and if they read into his love for these objects it was always the tactile feel that he went for, nothing sexual.

i prefer objects to people,they’re predictable and comforting.

 

[Wendy Butler]

Hi. This is a bit off-topic, but I noticed a couple of posts on this forum regarding objects as companions, and I wondered who else feels this way. For me, the bond is usually with machines, particularly cars.

I recently read a paper on objectum sexuality (OS) and autism, which was both interesting, and in some way comforting. The authors highlighted the need for further research and acceptance. However, I dislike the term 'objectum sexuality' as there is not necessarily a physical sexual component. I feel like the term could lead to it being misinterpreted as some kind of fetish rather than a deep emotional connection to objects. I hope that there can be greater recognition and understanding in the future.

I suspect that it is not as uncommon as is currently assumed and it is probably just understudied. 'OS' appears to be highly correlated with the autism spectrum, so it may help someone here to know that it is actually a thing. You are not alone. I can link the paper if anyone is interested.

Object Relations Theory helps us to understand why humans relate and attach to items that resonate with us emotionally. From the teddy bear in the cradle onwards.

 

[Wendy Butler]

Thanks for the link. I can easily relate to what has been said above. I often bring home abandoned toys and diverse paraphernalia, such as metal or wooden parts for example. I have always felt a deep connection with objects and often consider them on the same level as any other living species.

Yes, it’s perfectly acceptable to be known as a ‘collector’ for example, and if you note how many TV programmes relate to objects that people collect or desire to own it’s astonishing. Celebrity Antiques Road Trip, Bargain Hunt, The Bidder’s Room, Money for Nothing, The Repair Shop, Flog It, Antiques Road Show, Put your Money where your Mouth is, Fake or Fortune, and so on. All perfectly acceptable behaviours!

 

[r.mcgowan-griffin]

Object Relations Theory helps us to understand why humans relate and attach to items that resonate with us emotionally. From the teddy bear in the cradle onwards.

I'm not sure that's quite the same thing. I was under the impression that the term 'object' didn't literally mean an inanimate thing in that particular usage. Besides, I'm sure it has its roots in psychoanalysis, which has been pretty much discredited. I may be wrong though. It's not something I know much about.

Either way, when I say I form bonds to certain objects I mean they become literal friends, family members, and partners, the way a human would. I don't own or possess them any more than I would own a person. My cars are considered entities in their own right, even if non-sentient ones. Unlike my collections which are cherished objects with sentimental attachments, the cars are very much in the 'living thing' category in my head.

I've had no trauma in my life, I have a supportive family, and I have had relationships with actual humans (all of which have been amicable), so I don't think it comes from any place of negativity. I couldn't tell you where it does come from though. I am hoping that it will be the subject of some serious study at some point. Most of what has been written on the subject is speculative rather than empirical, and done without ever talking to people who experience this.