My Goth Phase

DepictDave

Active member
Bear with me on this, it is relevant to autism. It's #WorldGothDay so here's a few pics that I shared on social media of me from my goth days. Of course now I know that my goth "phase" was actually a search for identity before I even knew anything about autism. All I knew was that I was different from other people so I tried to express that in a more visible and obvious way. Now I know I'm autistic I'm much more comfortable in my identity and I don't feel the need to wear nail varnish, eyeliner or unusual clothes any more.

Let us know if you've been through any similar stages prior to diagnosis, or maybe even while trying to accept your autism whether diagnosed or not? It'll be interesting to see if this is just a me thing.
 

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ProfessorWorm

Active member
I have a small storage container’s worth of novelty print leggings (Dinosaurs, Rosie the Riveter, the map from Lord of the Rings, etc). I still wear them/collect them as they are so amazingly comfortable and I find them quite cute, but I began collecting at the same time that I was becoming increasingly aware that I was not a member of the majority and struggling to find a sense of self. My collection gave me that until I found an identity that wasn’t tacky leggings.
 

ThatWenchYas

New member
Those legging designs sound amazing, ProfessorWorm!
No, DepictDave, it's definitely not just a you thing. I didn't go through a goth phase myself, but I have always felt like I am part of the minority, and so would express that through wearing loads of dark clothing and listening to bands like Pantera and Metallica when I was at high school, despite the fact that no one else did.
 

ProfessorWorm

Active member
Thank you, ThatWenchYas, they most definitely are. Some of them I wound up coordinating with equally weird hairbows/fascinator type hair pieces. Have a lovely DIYed brain slug hair piece I did a bit ago to go with some spacey leggings.
 

14aaa

New member
I’m only just discovering that I have autism aged 51. I started wearing black about age 8 and went to my first punk concert. I still wear black but I wouldn’t call myself goth anymore and I don’t listen to music anymore.
 

Scary Clare

Scary Clare with purple hair
Bear with me on this, it is relevant to autism. It's #WorldGothDay so here's a few pics that I shared on social media of me from my goth days. Of course now I know that my goth "phase" was actually a search for identity before I even knew anything about autism. All I knew was that I was different from other people so I tried to express that in a more visible and obvious way. Now I know I'm autistic I'm much more comfortable in my identity and I don't feel the need to wear nail varnish, eyeliner or unusual clothes any more.

Let us know if you've been through any similar stages prior to diagnosis, or maybe even while trying to accept your autism whether diagnosed or not? It'll be interesting to see if this is just a me thing.
Been through? Still in!! I am a tattooed, purple haired weirdo and have no plans to ever change!!
 

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BTSO

New member
Yip, I can undersstand that

I have my diagnosis and still like to dye my hair blue and dress mainly in black (sometimes the black or purple lipstick in work situations gets me weird looks but most of my colleagues just accept and expect it)

I think for me the reasoning is that I like to use my hair and makeup as an example and as a beacon - to show others not to be scared to express who they are, they don't need to mask their quirky tastes and fit into societies norms but also to signal to other weird little souls that they have a safe space around me wherever I am.

I have been out in public and had people give me a knowing smile that says they admire it and wish they were brave enough and I have also been in situations where there are crowds and someone struggling and looking for support and that total stranger has chosen me to stand by while they have their panic attack or to make conversation with because they feel alone unit their mates show up.

So I reckon my beacon works for the purpose its intended for :)
 

Scary Clare

Scary Clare with purple hair
Yip, I can undersstand that

I have my diagnosis and still like to dye my hair blue and dress mainly in black (sometimes the black or purple lipstick in work situations gets me weird looks but most of my colleagues just accept and expect it)

I think for me the reasoning is that I like to use my hair and makeup as an example and as a beacon - to show others not to be scared to express who they are, they don't need to mask their quirky tastes and fit into societies norms but also to signal to other weird little souls that they have a safe space around me wherever I am.

I have been out in public and had people give me a knowing smile that says they admire it and wish they were brave enough and I have also been in situations where there are crowds and someone struggling and looking for support and that total stranger has chosen me to stand by while they have their panic attack or to make conversation with because they feel alone unit their mates show up.

So I reckon my beacon works for the purpose its intended for :)
I get loads of compliments about my purple hair which makes me feel good. I have never been conventional but I wave my weird flag with pride these days. If anyone has a problem, the issue is theirs not mine!
 

Forest Green

New member
I'm still Goth! Have been for nearly 20 years now :) I just love spooky things, and the music - everything from '80s old-school Goth Rock like The Damned, Joy Division, Sisters of Mercy and Siouxsie & The Banshees to Russian 'doomer' postpunk like Молчат Дома and Symphonic Metal such Nightwish and Within Temptation, and of course the fashion! I don't think I was every looking for a group that would accept me, I was just drawn to that which is dark, mysterious, morbid and strange. I was the sort of child that lurked in cemeteries, thought Hallowe'en was the best holiday, and wanted to be Wednesday Addams (I think I'm a bit chubby to be Morticia, but still, too old to be Wednesday now!). I dress like a combination vampire/pirate/bog-witch, have green hair with an undercut at the back, and wear enough silver to take down a werewolf just by being in proximity :p

Also, I think I might have the same coat as in Goth5.jpg!

I think for me the reasoning is that I like to use my hair and makeup as an example and as a beacon - to show others not to be scared to express who they are, they don't need to mask their quirky tastes and fit into societies norms but also to signal to other weird little souls that they have a safe space around me wherever I am.
I totally relate to BTSO here - I am the beacon of strange; my green hair is my freak-flag and the very tall boots on a very tall lady make for a reasonable flag-pole! I've made so many friends by just being publicly myself, people who have come up to me because I visibly share the 'not-the-norm' interests they do, but I also get a lot of heckling and sometimes violence for my look, and I also get people who are a bit *too* comfortable being 'unusual' around me and ask overly personal questions about things like BDSM!
 

DaraSix16

New member
I'm still Goth! Have been for nearly 20 years now :) I just love spooky things, and the music - everything from '80s old-school Goth Rock like The Damned, Joy Division, Sisters of Mercy and Siouxsie & The Banshees to Russian 'doomer' postpunk like Молчат Дома and Symphonic Metal such Nightwish and Within Temptation, and of course the fashion! I don't think I was every looking for a group that would accept me, I was just drawn to that which is dark, mysterious, morbid and strange. I was the sort of child that lurked in cemeteries, thought Hallowe'en was the best holiday, and wanted to be Wednesday Addams (I think I'm a bit chubby to be Morticia, but still, too old to be Wednesday now!). I dress like a combination vampire/pirate/bog-witch, have green hair with an undercut at the back, and wear enough silver to take down a werewolf just by being in proximity :p

Also, I think I might have the same coat as in Goth5.jpg!

I think for me the reasoning is that I like to use my hair and makeup as an example and as a beacon - to show others not to be scared to express who they are, they don't need to mask their quirky tastes and fit into societies norms but also to signal to other weird little souls that they have a safe space around me wherever I am.
I totally relate to BTSO here - I am the beacon of strange; my green hair is my freak-flag and the very tall boots on a very tall lady make for a reasonable flag-pole! I've made so many friends by just being publicly myself, people who have come up to me because I visibly share the 'not-the-norm' interests they do, but I also get a lot of heckling and sometimes violence for my look, and I also get people who are a bit *too* comfortable being 'unusual' around me and ask overly personal questions about things like BDSM!
Before I was a punk I was a wee greeb but none of the others liked me that much because I didn't like Marylin Manson or them trousers with all the eyelets you can buy from the shops I liked Siouxsie and the Banshees, SoM, Bauhaus, Alien Sex Fiend and Joy Division and making my own clothes or modifying charity shop finds - Seeing some of these as your first examples of Goth music just made me grin.

And I concur I fly my freak flag high but my style is now more of a reflection of me - combining elements of all my so called "stages" and "fads", Monochrome sportswear, big boots, dark glasses, half shaven head and tattoos (not as many as I'd like but ££££).

The heckling and the violence have subsided in recent years but I do still infrequently get dragged into confrontational situations for how I look but I've always thought that's why alternative people wear chains and studs - self defence. I had my hair set on fire as a teen by a group of 10 and that fkn sucked - 6" had to be cut off and I ended up with a Jim Morrison Bob - shaved it to a deathhawk soon after and then (poorly) dyed it purple