Autistic LGBTQIA+ experience

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Although I cannot join this discussion, I will say that as an older Irish gay man with autism in the U.K., that I would not feel confident about approaching the LGBT community about my diagnosis if I had become aware of it before 2021 as up to this point, even though I’m aware that many LGBT people are autistic and vice versa, aside from general lack of appropriate support post diagnosis, in the (up to 18 years) before my diagnosis, I’d endured a lot of prejudice and discrimination from (within) the LGBT community especially from other gay men in particular and much of this prejudice and discrimination from within the LGBT community relates to my family and cultural background and religious beliefs that I’d been raised in, especially in a traditional Irish Catholic cultural setting in my native Ireland
 
From simple observation (I'm straight), I suspect gender identity is a social norm which the ND don't share, or at least as strongly. It's not that specific, though: NDs tend to curiosity and that defies boundaries. We also find grounding in ways which cross a kink boundary without being sexually kinky, although at a guess there's likely to be as many getting their kicks from you name it as in the NT community, ie most are not. This may be an aspect of our greater isolation, too, as having been thoroughly roughed up as our personae form, we want nothing to do with the NT normative groups, so are divergent in this as well.
 
I agree with the idea that ASD people are less rigid about gender identity. At 76 I am firmly straight. And I don’t think it’s social programming. In assessment I recalled my dismay at first developing breasts. Nothing to do with wanting to be male but, as a female in the early 60s, having a sense that I would lose freedoms and be expected to behave a certain way ie. Ladylike. I was a tomboy.
I have an androgynous body with broad shoulders and narrow hips and still wear mens trousers because they fit better. I have in fancy dress worn male outfits. Fun and curiosity but not a desire to be male. In relationships, friendships I have never felt sexual towards other women. That’s why when it comes to gender changing treatments I am on the side of caution when it comes to treating young people under say early 20s utilbthe brain finishes developing. That is not deny young people from being addressed by a different pronoun or dressing as they want. I just feel physically changing bodies before a person is fully grown is unwise.
 
I agree with the idea that ASD people are less rigid about gender identity. At 76 I am firmly straight. And I don’t think it’s social programming. In assessment I recalled my dismay at first developing breasts. Nothing to do with wanting to be male but, as a female in the early 60s, having a sense that I would lose freedoms and be expected to behave a certain way ie. Ladylike. I was a tomboy.
I have an androgynous body with broad shoulders and narrow hips and still wear mens trousers because they fit better. I have in fancy dress worn male outfits. Fun and curiosity but not a desire to be male. In relationships, friendships I have never felt sexual towards other women. That’s why when it comes to gender changing treatments I am on the side of caution when it comes to treating young people under say early 20s utilbthe brain finishes developing. That is not deny young people from being addressed by a different pronoun or dressing as they want. I just feel physically changing bodies before a person is fully grown is unwise.
I tend to agree with this as a traditional Catholic and as a conservative minded older Irish gay man in the U.K. 23 years myself, especially in changing a young person’s physical body below the 20’s age group re changing genders. We have heard some terrible stories where this has happened to young people in their 20’s and below and they have in later life regretted doing so and even the reversal of these treatments has been even more damaging. What I see happening to some children in primary schools today with activists taking up influential positions in primary schools in particular, in some cases without the consent or even knowledge of the parents, often against the parents own religious beliefs, including in my native Ireland, is horrifying. Frankly I don’t believe that any of these issues are ever appropriate for any school setting, especially not primary schools.
 
I really don't see why children can't be left alone to explore their identity without adults trying to guide them. Not just around gender but also around how they want to present. Smart or not, make up or not, casual or not. Let them find their tribe without interference. That's the joy of adolescence!
 
I agree with the idea that ASD people are less rigid about gender identity. At 76 I am firmly straight. And I don’t think it’s social programming. In assessment I recalled my dismay at first developing breasts. Nothing to do with wanting to be male but, as a female in the early 60s, having a sense that I would lose freedoms and be expected to behave a certain way ie. Ladylike. I was a tomboy.
I have an androgynous body with broad shoulders and narrow hips and still wear mens trousers because they fit better. I have in fancy dress worn male outfits. Fun and curiosity but not a desire to be male. In relationships, friendships I have never felt sexual towards other women. That’s why when it comes to gender changing treatments I am on the side of caution when it comes to treating young people under say early 20s utilbthe brain finishes developing. That is not deny young people from being addressed by a different pronoun or dressing as they want. I just feel physically changing bodies before a person is fully grown is unwise.
That's close to me, because I had good reason to cheer when the High Court clipped The Tavistock Clinics wings. Their arrogance in the Reassignment issue is simply a continuation of their "authority" as Freud's final home: I suffered because they had my data at the top end and blocked me from the support all other children at that level received. In fact, they leaked my data to my peers which left me completely ostracised forever. I've had normal peer relationships in work, and to a limited extent in outside life, but no good long-term friends from my home community - even in my family. I learned the truth when I was 60, too late to do anything about it, too hurt in the difference in realities to look to the future. I've given one heck of a lot to make make this world a better place, and all I got was insulting BS (arising from ignorance of their subject) in the diagnosis. It was the same at the very start - they knew but didn't say. Ever heard of informed consent? It still happens, Craig Wright still advises not telling the kid lest he become conceited. Bugger that, if the poor sod's going to be pulling stunts most of his peers can't get the faintest handle on (Cassandra Syndrome) then he at least has the right to know why and how.
Your physiological approach is the current legal one, there've been enough who've regretted it later for the High Court to take direct control. The family's not the place, in many earlier societies there was a mentor outside of that circle. Mine was the husband of the Guide Commissioner for the South East, in his own right Father of the Chapel of the Financial Times, while in School I was in protective measures under the School Sergeant, so seriously involved in the Admin. By the time I was in University it was clear my path was introducing the military to the excellence of Peace. All wars end in peace, they're just an exercise in wasting resources. So get to the objective fastest and demonstrate that whatever your rivals try, you've outmanoeuvered them. Technically, Musashi's Empty Hand technique.

As far as Rome's concerned, I was Jonahed into position to have the ArchiAssociation (HQ) of the Eucharist land on me. Some numerologists saw it coming, but lacked the faith to be charitable about it - their loss. The biggest question in my mind is WHY. The hope of salvation through grace, in repentant confession and in their own terms, perpetual adoration, that's significant. I sussed "why them" in particular, but that just made it worse that they failed. Essentially too much was asked of them as fallible humans, but at a higher level, God's Vicar on Earth must meet that challenge, it's possible. In fact, Matthew 6 is my anchor, I'm not buying any of the flim-flam hogwash, I deal with the Boss directly, it's been properly tested, and Lord alone help me. Our father, give us this day our daily bread, the substance of faith from the Lord as much as physical victuals. Matthew18:8 is serious, and suggests the Petrine Mandate, On this rock I build My Church, has been suspended. Bergoglio is accused, with evidence, of collaboration with the Junta while Archbishop of Buenas Aires, in the "disappearance" of the children of the Mothers of the 5th May Square. Children who were sent on one-way helicopter trips into the middle of the estuary of the River Plate. Skydiving without a parachute. The water's as hard as steel from a few hundred feet up. How can a normal human believe? The local church here had to be replaced because the priests were caught kiddy-diddling. The answer is that the Boss is undeniable. The Holy Father, less so: Leo XIII, Holy Father, Anna de Meeus, Mother Superior General, Camillo Pecci, their child, Capo di Guarda Nobile and Nepote gatekeeper to His Holiness, happy families indeed.
 
I've given up on organised religion. It's usually a power kick for those that run it. I'll make an exception for the current Pope who is battling against the corrupt odds.
If I lean towards anything that could be regarded as belief it's the 'Star Wars' force. I find Buddhism gives me the spirituality I want.
All this is a long way from allowing children to find their own identity without adults imposing their own ideas.
 
They won't succeed in any case - Matt 6 makes a good case for personal faith rather than organised religion, rather along the lines of your case, community delusion. That's why I'm reacting negatively to any adherence to a creed or doctrine, it's a substitute for the real deal. You'll note, please, that there's nothing hypothetical about my experience, faith has been confirmed by delivery so many, many times. It's one-on-one, as real as down the phone, you may not be face to face but. This is where doctrines like some priest claiming to intercede for you get it wrong. I don't know where it'll go with anyone (usually - I'm partly a seer) but that's the beauty of their lived experience, it's theirs. All this is why I talk of the numinous, as I don't want anyone hijacking it for their own cult.
 
The link to the video is posted in the original post for those who want to watch it.

Please stick to the topic of the thread. Please stay within the boundaries of this forum, which is a secular space, so that everyone feels comfortable.
 
I was late diagnosed, aged 61.
My whole life I've not known why I "never fitted; never fitted in".
At times I've wondered if I should've been a boy - decided not.
I've wondered if I were a boy trapped in a female body - decided not.

All these ideas go through your head when you just know you're not like others; that you're excluded; that you're different. But you don't have a name for it.

I knew I wasn't adopted, or swapped at birth... as I look like my dad's side of the family.
Was I an alien? (Too many sci-fi films in the 70s I think; that idea was VERY short lived, but the ideas go through your head).
All these ideas go through your head when you're struggling in life to know who you are, where you fit... and never fit anywhere.

I now know: 110% heterosexual (always thought so).... just with Aspergers.
I found the fit.

But this stuff all goes through your head, all the new ideas you're presented with, or dream up ... when you've not got a name for what you are.
 
As an older “out” Gay man I’m somewhat conflicted on this, as I’m also a traditional, conservative-minded, pro-life Irish Catholic patriot, even before my diagnosis - I know that there are many to and fros politically regarding gay politics and the geopolitical gay landscape with the modern day LGBT community, within which I was never really accepted because of my background, but I also find it incredible that despite the fact that so many within the LGBT community have autism and vice versa there is a certain disconnect in terms of practical help, support and acceptance where our issues are so similar as to be parallel, there are also those who use a diagnosis of autism or a coming out as LGBT for other motivations and agendas as an excuse for manipulation and other nefarious things
 
I totally understand where you're coming from. It can be tough dealing with discrimination within the LGBT community, especially with autism involved. It’s frustrating when a community meant to be supportive ends up being exclusive. Hopefully, more open conversations can lead to a more inclusive environment for everyone.
 
I totally understand where you're coming from. It can be tough dealing with discrimination within the LGBT community, especially with autism involved. It’s frustrating when a community meant to be supportive ends up being exclusive. Hopefully, more open conversations can lead to a more inclusive environment for everyone.
Without transparent and truly honest free speech in a very real sense, based entirely on truth “warts and all” and where this must be free of any censorship of any kind on any issue, how can we possibly hope to identify the problems, let alone solutions as a basis for taking the correct actions, in order to address these many issues? - on other fronts, we see how in responding to many other problems, many people in the U.K. alone, having become devoid of any hope, are actually calling for the U.K. to “crash and burn” - having lived 23 years in this great country that the U.K. still is and still can be, coming from the Irish Catholic background that I do, this is a truly heartbreaking statement, even though these problems are far worse in my native Ireland, where I’m starting to see the same kind of mindset - many of my U.K. friends have all but given up all hope of rescuing and salvaging the U.K. for future generations and I really do feel sorry for my U.K. friends who have been so demoralised and ground down for so many decades, if not a century, that they are beginning to feel this way, which is especially relevant in the post-Covid era