mirandakeys56
New member
Hi I am new here and I have a problem making and keeping friends cause I have autism
Autism / Aspergers Diagnosis & Mental Health support
- Thread starter Simon_7001
- Start date
Hi Mirandakeys56 - me too. I struggle to notice when people might be open to be friends, then I don't seem to be able to catch the rythm of maintaining connection. Mostly its ok, but I would like someone to go to the theatre/cinema/walk/coffee/ etc with, just to have a chat. I have found that joining a running club - learning to run group, i have had social activity, and met new people. Not yet friends, but friendly. Is there something new that you would like to try? i have found excercise classes, running, yoga etc are easier than other social things, because no one expects you to talk all the time. Running next to people, not face to face. i am nearly 60 btw, and 4 stone overweight, so not a gym bunny. It is lonely sometimes and frustrating.
HI Blue sky and Miranda, depending where you live www.meetup.com had many groups for Autistic Adults, meeting face to face & online. Some just for women.
London is a good area for getting out and there are even more groups of special interest like you say about running, art, anything!
London is a good area for getting out and there are even more groups of special interest like you say about running, art, anything!
mirandakeys56
New member
I live in the united states
In US, they have Autism Speaks. I have Asperger and I think USA has a better environment for people with Autism (Well at least much better than the ones in Asia such as India and China). Now we can see many corporations in US are advocating Neurodiversity initiatives, although mainly for tech roles, but it's a good start
mirandakeys56
New member
Well the only thing good about the us as far as autism goes is autism speaks DDSN witch is Department of Disability and Special Need other than that the US does not give a fuck about us autistic people
Well I know not everyone likes it but Elon Musk already came out as an Aspie and that meant a lot. It is normal that they don't give a shit about us as if Autistics rise, it means normal people have to fall. It is just that simple. What is normality anyway? It is socially constructed. The issue is we have to abandon the label and stop the society from calling the Autistics as "disabled" as the term is not ok and have caused a lot of problems. But at the same time, we could hide ourselves and try to overcome our difficulties. I know a lot of Autistic people are hiding in the corporations. They are undiagnosed, older than me at least, but they really are on it. Some are in banking and some are in tech. My mentor is one, but he will never admit it in public. People hate troubles and they don't like us much as they think we keep asking for help. We should believe in ourselves and we could do more even without their special care. Once we succeed, we can earn more respect
Believe me or not, as the society develops into a tech-reliant one , more and more kids will be born as "Autistic" and until then, more and more parents will all stand up for their "Autistic" kids and they will clean our name when the time comes and hopefully remove the disability labels. This is all written in the genes and they can't escape that. Kids of professors, bankers, coders, engineers, mathematicians...They are more likely to have autism. Selfishness is always part of human nature and we just need to wait for that to happen.
mirandakeys56
New member
Yea we are just as smart as anyone else but the people who call us disabled is what is limiting us to do the stuff we want I want to go to the Olympics doing horses but if I can get into the Olympics doing horses I will not hide the fact that I have autism and I never do hide the fact that I have autism I just try to do the things I like and not worry about how slow I have to do it
Maybe not just "as smart as" anyone else, many of us possess very high IQ (I understand this might offend some people, but it is true). There's a problem if you think you are just as smart as them as some of us also have sensory problems, which means normal people would still think we are at lower positions than them and even think we are the trouble. The only way to fight against the suppression is we prove we have higher IQ and can outperform them both at work and in life. Personally I already tested my IQ and I did not notice I have Asperger until I had finished university. I personally want more and more of us to come out as we need Autism to become the "norm", rather than just some discriminatory labels hanging out there. Autistics will be the ones and probably the only ones who could actually solve the world's issues. We have the brains that could think outside the box. They will eventually need us.
mirandakeys56
New member
Okay so think that we autistic people are smarter than the normal people?
I don't speak for everyone, but why you think you are less smarter than so called "normal people"? Why devalue yourself? As I said, normality is socially constructed. It's the spectrum and everyone is different. You can research more paper on the topic "creativity genius and Autism". Researchers have found links between intelligence and autism (and also genius and madness) long ago. Many autistics people get offended when talking about the intelligence/IQ. In my opinion, let's take asperger as example, having Asperger already means you at least have normal to high IQ (but normally i will consider it as high) and i don't see the point of devaluing themselves, while high-functioning autism might not have the same high IQ as Aspie, they should not be discriminated. Depending on individuals, some might need more help from the society while some can live totally independently just like me.
mirandakeys56
New member
I am not less smarter than the normal people but I don't think that I am smarter than the normal people I don't think that there is anyone in this world that is smarter than anyone else
Your choice then. But those normal people will continue discriminating you. I disagree with you. I think there are people out there who are smarter than the rest. Human can be equal, but human is obviously unequal.
Normal people always say "Geniuses are made, not born", but we belong to the "Geniuses are born, not made". Born Geniuses or made geniuses? if you still don't see the conflicts between normal people and us, then you haven't see clearly how unfair this society is. We are the ones who will lead AI to its peak, if we are "awake". Normal people can't make true AI if they can't understand the brains first.
mirandakeys56
New member
I do believe that genius people are born not made but thinking that all autistic people are smarter than normal people then I disagree with you cause I don't even have a normal IQ I have less then average so I don't believe that I am smarter than normal people nor do I think that I am dummer then normal people
That was why i said it's spectrum everyone is different and IQ is a debatable topic. But does that really matter? Who said you can't be smarter than those normal people with your IQ? IQ is a quantified measurement. We autistics have been suppressed for years. Do you really think the normal people will treat us equally? It might take years. You see, you are great you can communicate with me and we understand the conversation. I don't really want to offend other autistics as even I share some common difficulties with you, I understand I could not understand all your pains, but sometimes being too peaceful means you get nothing. This is a cruel world. If we don't fight for it, we get nothing.
mirandakeys56
New member
I don't have any fight left in me to be honest I really don't care about what people think of me
maybe you do but you pretend you don't? If you don't care what they think of you, why you even bother to be here? Many people claim they don't care what others think because of self-defence mechanism. Honestly I would like them to separate Asperger from Autism again as obviously we are different
Some of you don't want to fight for your rights and future, but some of us do.
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